"loathing unadulterated loathing"

i hate birds. every kind of bird. fake birds, real birds, black birds, designs with birds...i hate loathe birds. 
everyone knows this. i mean anyone who knows anything at all about me, knows that i hate birds. my family however, likes to think it's hilarious to torture me!

on saturday, i came home from work and found on my bed the conspiracy of my mother and middle sister, Alicia. (VA helped, but much to my surprise wasn't in on the entire deal.) VA had bought a bird cage at a yard sale on saturday morning, and apparently had bought a stupid black bird around halloween and had just been holding on to it. (for what reason other that to torture me, i'm not sure...but we'll let it slide THIS time.)
apparently, this bird "found" it's way into said bird cage and then somehow, that darn bird cage "found" it's way onto my bed. i was in no way a happy camper!

i stayed calm for a few minutes, "ok, nice joke...just get this stupid thing out of my room."  finally, my sister did get it out of my room...but she decided to try and put it in my face and chace me with me. she ran me out of the house, then sat the bird on the door handle, so i was not about to go back inside until the thing was moved. that was when the yelling commenced. finally she took it off, and sat it on my cell phone which was on the kitchen table. i took a magazine and flung it across the room off my phone, but then Momma started with it.

She had cashed my check from the dealership earlier that morning, and had put the money envelop in the bird cage with the bird sitting on top. (grrr) once i told her to take it out, she played the horrible little "torture audra with a bird" game.
daddy's cane just happened to be in the bathroom, so i took it and knocked the stupid thing across the room, out of momma's hands. i broke it, but it was well deserved!!  i finally got my money and cell phones, and left the house and said that bird better not be there when i returned. (it was, just not in my room anymore! ha!)

now i know, that you're probably laughing at this and thinking what kind of idiot runs from a fake bird. but i'm seriously scared horrified of birds. like when they fly over my car while driving, i duck and have a minor freak out. (i try to keep the freak out inside so people don't judge, but sometimes those darn things are just too big.)
it's no different that being scared of snakes and then having someone throw a rubber snake in your face. you wouldn't like that, huh? well my mom is scared of snakes...and she's out of town this week...so this "war" could get good. :) (muahahha.)

i'm really enjoying c&c. it gets a little boring at times, and it's hard trying to keep busy when we've been so slow this week. but i'm trying to act like i am, anyway! ha! the only thing i don't like is having to eat breakfast lunch sometime between 10am and 11am, because i have to be here at 11am and must eat before i come. i normally get hungry again around 3 or 4, so then i snack on junk food, which i think is actually worse for me. oh, well i guess it could be worse...i couldn't get to eat "lunch" at all...or not have a job!!!  *thank ya, Jesus i do!*

speaking of jobs, i've got two friends who are currently in need of one. so pray for them with me! i know God will provide!

hope you're all having a fabulous week!!! :)